Stuff That Happens To Me

This really happened. Swear it.

Went to Yamba and stayed at Angourie Rainforest Resort. Decided to have 30 minute hand massage. Sounded interesting whilst not being painful and / or intrusive like other types of massage. Anyway.

Walk in.
Spa Lady: "oh, you're pregnant.
Me (dying a little): "er no. But I just had a baby! "
SL: "not just fat then?"
Me (whimpy) "no."
SL: "how old is bub?"
Me: "6 weeks old."

She's not. She's older than that. But like I'm going to tell SL that! In fact was going to lie even more and say she was 2 weeks old, but might not have been believable.

This could only happen to me.

If I knew what the hell a "#" does I might have created a "#" entitled precisely "shit that could only happen to me."

Here's the thing. You NEVER say to a woman "are you pregnant?" EVEN IF she is in labour. You don't.